Tuesday, October 18, 2011


The following letter was written by Sharon.

You recently bought a piece of equipment for your kitchen but it did not work. You phoned the shop but no action was taken.Write a letter to the shop manager. In your letter

• describe the problem with the equipment

• explain what happened' when you phoned the shop

• say what you would like the manager to do.

Dear sir or madam,

This letter is in relation to a complaint regarding a microwave oven purchased by me from your shop.

The equipment bearing item number A765 was purchased last week on 9 October 2011 and the same was delivered by your staff at my home. Upon delivery, I tried to operate it; however, the moment I plugged it in to the socket a big short circuit occurred. I immediately called your customer service department and informed them about this problem. They took all the necessary details and assured me that they will send a personnel to survey the same and based on his survey an appropriate action would be taken. However, a week has passed now and no action has been taken yet, in spite of the fact that I called your department numerous times.

I would appreciate if you could kindly look in to the matter and escalate the process. Further, since the item is under warranty, I would prefer it being replaced rather than being repaired.

I hope to hear from you soon and expect that my matter would be resolved on an urgent basis.

Yours faithfully,

Sharon Murali

Wordcount: 197



You were able to achieve the task by giving the details about the broken microwave and what happened during the phone call. However, your wordcount is 197. Reduce to 150-165 words.


Vocabulary is varied: personnel, socket, circuit. "Escalate" should be "expedite".


Points are clear and logical. There were some transition words used: further, however. Improve organization by using the 3-paragraph format:

Introduction-problem with equipment

Body-what happened when you called

Conclusion-action required


There were no grammar errors noted.

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